Thursday, March 26, 2015

A long and boring end to February

Feb. 23, 2015

Another snow day for the kids.  Adam was nice and emailed me that they were at my house as of 7:30am: he sent the message at 8:09am.  Luckily, I was home when they got dropped off so i already knew they were home.  I took this opportunity to remind Adam that if the children do not have school on Mondays his parenting time goes until 6pm.  He replied with a "?"  If he took the time to read the parenting agreement he would know this stuff.  Since he seems incapable of reading the document on his own I read it for him and summarized: The parenting orders state that if the children do not have school on Monday, your parenting time is extended to 6pm.  Apparently that was clearer.  He told me he thought that rule only applied to holidays.  Well, that would be an example of Adam adding meaning to things because the parenting agreement does not say "only on holidays."  So emailed that he planned on going and picking the kids up.  Good.
Then I asked if he would be available to keep the kids overnight on Friday.  The whole right of first refusal thing states I have to ask him before I ask mom.  I'll wait on pins and needles for his response.  (sarcasm)

Feb. 24, 2015

Got my answer! I 'd like to but I'm not able to this weekend. Sorry. :(  <<<These little faces that he adds to emails annoy me.  I would do this if I was on friendly terms with someone.  That's not the case here.

Then he wrote he just learned that he needs to have me execute a quit claim deed and have it notarized and recorded at the county auditor's office. Unfortunately, Wells Fargo is not giving him a lot of time to get this together so he needs to have it done as soon as possible. He asked what would be the very easiest way for him to help me to accomplish this? He doesn't mind doing the leg work if it gets it signed sooner and back to Wells Fargo.

He was "nice" and added that I'll also have to have him do a quit claim deed to release his claim on this house so I can sell it. Please advise.

Please advise?  What the heck kind of statement is that?  First he adds a sad face then "please advise?"  

I got back to him letting him know my schedule fills up quickly  and if he would like to suggest a date and time I would look to see if I was free.  He asked if I was available this week.  He wants it done tomorrow afternoon, or Thursday morning, or Friday.  Interstingly, he added that there are only two meetings he cannot change on his end: Wed from 10-11:30am and Thurs 230-330pm.  Why do I fond this interesting?  Didn't he throw a mini tantrum about having the kids after school on Wednesdays because he had a meeting at that time?  Um, where in this new list does he have a mandatory unmoveable meeting at 2pm?  Nowhere!

It turns out my calendar is booked for this week.  

He wrote: We can do this anywhere in front of a notary to sign the document. If you have a notary at your workplace we could use him or her, or any of the notaries at the administration office if you'd prefer to be there when the document is recorded. I'm not sure what other places employ notaries, but I am open to suggestions. 
If there's a place that is more convenient for you, I'll do that. I'd like to make it as easy as possible for you so I can get the document signed quickly and keep Wells Fargo from foreclosing on the house. Next week my schedule is similar to this one, but I am also unavailable Tuesday 2:30 - 3:30.

I like how he isn't passive in this process that has a benefit to him.  

I replied: I think it would be unethical to use a colleague to notarize a personal document during work hours.  I do get a 30 min lunch so if there is a bank in the town I work, with a notary that you can schedule with around 1:15pm next Wednesday, I can add it to my planner.
Can you explain how filing a quit claim keeps the home from getting foreclosed on?  I don't know how that works.

He actually wrote something useful as a response! "Those arrangements are fine, I will set that up. 

For info: I have applied for homeowner protection from Wells Fargo, which is why you were sent information about it in the mail, as one of the people on the mortgage. My home preservation specialist  has been working with me on getting all of the needed information to be able to apply for one of their preservation options. I have provided him with all my financial information and the application packet, but they need additional documentation ASAP in order to forward it to their underwriters. 

The options they provide are a.) loan modification (to keep the home), b.) short sale, or c.) deed in lieu of foreclosure. Each of these is much better on our credit than a full foreclosure. I was given until February 8th to provide the needed documentation, which included our signed divorce decree and a quit claim deed stating that you no longer have legal stake in the property. Since the divorce decree was not finished by then, my application timeline expired and the foreclosure clock began counting down again. I applied again the other day when I got the divorce decree in the mail in order to forestall foreclosure (because the mortgage is several months behind), but I don't yet have the quit claim deed to send to them. This is why it's urgent that I get this done as soon as possible. If I don't, the bank will initiate a foreclosure, and then all of the other options that could keep from damaging our credit scores will be off the table. We've already received a pre-foreclosure letter, so every day counts. 

Does this all make sense? I hate that I need to bother you for this, and if I was able to just take care of things myself I would leave you alone about it. "  
I would like to point out that Adam knew he needed the quit claim by 2/8 but did not ask me until 2/23.  Then it was urgent!  Rush!  Now!  I also like how it will ruin "our" credit.  Nice.  Um, I am held free and clear of anything related to the house, per the divorce decree.  Sure, my credit might take a hit and I might need to write a bunch of letters and provide documentation but I bet I could get my credit fixed.  I also find it funny that way back a year ago, he claimed he was worried I would screw his credit.  Here he is screwing mine.  

Feb. 25, 2015

This was from me to Adam: I received the bill from Children's Hospital for Ms. Middle Child.  Please see the attachment for the breakdown of amounts paid and due. It shows that I already paid the $75 copay, you will need to reimburse me 65% of that amount which is $48.75.  The insurance was billed and paid their portion leaving $125.00 for us to pay.  I will pay 35% ($43.75) and you will have the remaining 65% ($81.25).  This bill is due 3/3/15.  Invoice number to reference on payment 10****53.  Payment can be made online at (insert url here) or mailed to (insert address here).
The therapist cannot accept a partial payment from me for the weekly copays.  I have set up to pay him on a monthly basis.  The copay is $20 a week and he has requested to see her weekly.  As I mentioned previously, this comes to $7/wk paid by me and $13/wk paid by you.  I will send you a copy of the invoice when I get it.  I understand that you were not expecting the hospital bill so I don't expect you to reimburse me any sooner than the bill due date of 3/3/15.  For the therapist bill, I will expect to be reimbursed three days from the email containing the invoice.  


Please contact all your utility companies and verify the bills are only in your name and the billing address is correct.  I just received a disconnect notice from Vectren for the your house.  I called to verify the account information and to ask that I be removed.  She stated the billing address is my home and I was listed as your spouse, I was unable to change it and told you will need to call.  The bill shows a pass due amount of $95.98 and current charges of $78.14, total due $174.12 by 3/2/15.  Disconnect is scheduled for 3/3/15.  I will send the bill with the children but it will not arrive before the bill and disconnect dates.  If you would like to pick it up prior to your next parenting time, 3/4/15, please schedule a time to come by.  


Feb. 27, 2015

He replied: 
- Attached is the quit claim deed to sign. I'll set up a notary appointment next Wednesday 
- Please provide me all of the details relevant to Ms. Middle Child's medical care. I am in the dark about it since I wasn't consulted
- I called Vectren and fixed the issue and made sure the address was right

Cue me biting my tongue a smidge.  He was left in the dark and not consulted about his child's self harming?  Really?  REALLY?!  Screw him.

Cue me replying more politely.  I gave him the name of the therapist and the office number.  he can get himself out of the dark.  I gave him a flashlight in the beginning and he threw it away.  

Later, he emailed that the school tried to call me.  He said to call them.  Well, duh.  I checked my phone and it didn't show any missed calls.  I called the school and found out they had no buses.  I took the rest of the day off so I could get the children.  I drove there and was told Adam had already picked them up.  I sent him an email thanking him for trying to help.  If similar circumstances happen again, I asked he please call me so I know what is going on.  If I am I unreachable by cell phone, I added he can call my work number. 

The disgruntled part of me wanted to add, if you knew there was no bussing why didn't you add that in the email?  If you were just going to pick them up 20 minutes after emailing me why didn't you email that?!  Why not communicate with me?!

By the way, when I got to the school, they teacher that had called me tried calling again and her phone had an automatic message saying my number was disconnected.  I said, no, I was just using it.  She called again and it went through.  Weird.  

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