Things seem to be better

March 30, 2014

            I sent extra clothes with the kids to Adam’s house.  I let him know they can keep all the clothes there, that way they don’t have to pack each time they come to his house.  I figure if they need to pack it sends the message that they are just visiting and I want them to start feeling like they have two homes.  I guess I was late sending the message because they were already packed up. 

            Adam also made sure to let me know how difficult it was picking up one child at the dance then the other at the theatre.  Then driving theatre kid back and forth on Saturday.  He said that was too much time in the car and he doesn’t like doing that.  Adam needs to understand: that’s life with children.  I have been the transporter of children up until now.  It isn’t hard, just time consuming.  He can get over that because theatre means a lot to the kids.

March 31, 2014

            Adam said he transferred enough money to cover two weeks of allowance.  He also said he will send me the bill info so I can be in charge of the bills in this house again.  Thank goodness!

            He also apologized for reacting brash earlier.  He said he has forgiven me but it still hurts every single minute.  He’s going to try to take a breath or count to 30 next time I start to push his buttons.  Now if he would just be clear about what buttons I was pushing I could make an effort to not push them. 

April 1, 2014

            I was a bit worried about Adam yesterday because the day seemed to treat him rough.  He said it was the loneliness hitting him in a big way.  He said he would try to warn me when he is feeling really bad so I know what to expect.  He said he is working to improve on letting me know what to expect since I have said I never know what to expect from him.  He said he is trying to do his part to have less conflict with me.  I let him know that when he is feeling lonely, or better before he feels lonely, he can call and talk to the kids.  He doesn’t call them often and maybe it would help all of them if he did. 

April 3, 2014

            Adam wanted to take three of the children out for lunch.  I said I would have them get ready quickly.  They must have had fun because then he texted saying they wanted to go to his house so he would have them back by 4pm. 

April 4, 2014

            Adam needs the Progress Book info for the kids.  I don’t have all of it and told him the district office could help him.  He needs their homeroom teachers. 

            He asked if I could drop the kids off at 7pm instead of 6pm.  I asked if I need to feed them dinner and he said it was up to me.  I don’t want to mess up his plans, though.  I got to his house a little before 7pm.  He wasn’t there until 5-10 minutes after.  Why?  First Friday bar fun.  I hate knowing he is drinking before taking over the responsibility for the kids care.  I also am not pleased that he is skipping out on his parenting time so he can go to a bar. 

April  6, 2014

            Little girl lost some teeth at Adam’s house.  He was able to be tooth fairy once but needs me to play it again.  Teamwork fooling our child!

April 7, 2014

            Found a check for Adam.  I asked him to remind me to give it to him.  I hope this shows him that I am not interested in stealing or spending all his money and he can trust me.  Hoping, not expecting.

April 8, 2014

            Tax stuff is stressful. It looks like we will owe a bunch and we are thinking of taking out a HELOC to cover it all. 

            Adam needed to know if I had retained a lawyer.  I haven’t mainly because a while back Adam told me not to.  I talked to one and that was all.  Adam then informed me he is using a lawyer to draft the dissolution.  He said his lawyer would like to talk to me directly and we can be Co Plaintiffs.  Last I heard a lawyer couldn’t have both our best interests.  Sounds like a bad idea.  Plus, what happened to doing the dissolution together?

April 9, 2014

            Parent meeting about the 7^th grade DC trip.  I asked Adam if he wanted to go or if I should.  He has band practice so I will go and take notes to give him. 

April 10, 2014

            Adam accepted my olive branch.  It’s been a couple of days so I’ve had time to feel rejected.  Makes it hard to keep the olive branch extended. 

            He saw a new therapist today.  He also said he has been in a positive mood this week.  Both are good things, he needs them.  He said she came as a recommendation from friends and is a hard-ass.  He seemed to enjoy her even though she was harsh.  She gave him a lot of homework and confirmed some of what he worried about as far as neediness.  He offered to chat about it if I am interested. 

           

April 11, 2014

            I told Adam if he wants to share what he learned in his therapy session he could.  He asked me to not share with anyone but then didn’t say anything else.

April 14, 2014

            We have a city tax bill of $4617.  How did that happen?!  I also got a call from ATT saying the bill was due.  I asked Adam if I am supposed to be covering that with the money he gives me each month.  He said no, he is paying the bills now and they got paid 3/21. 

            We talked about the kids for a bot.  Adam said the kids are having meltdowns.  I see some improvement in behavior when I have them.

            I also needed him to sit with little man tomorrow, luckily he can. 

April 16, 2014

            Adam needed all the kids’ birth certificates.  I used the scanner app we both have to get him copies.  I had to order one for little man, though.  Should be here in a couple days. 

            I let Adam know the court date for the small claims hearing with the tenants I had evicted is on 5/13.  I hope I have all the evidence ready and organized!

           

April 17, 2014

            I had to ask Adam to transfer the weekly allowance because the amount I left in the joint account was taken out for a tax bill and savings got used for the overdraft amount. 

            Adam volunteered to watch little man while I take a DANTES exam.  He said they have fun.  Mom is watching him but maybe she will let Adam instead. 

            He also wants to know what my plans are for the oldest’s birthday and Easter.  I figure we are both scheduled to have the kids a portion of each day so we don’t need to work out a schedule.  I’ll take the birthday girl out in the morning and afternoon, he can do something in the evening.  On Easter he has them in the morning and I have them in the evening.  Works perfect!